It sounds obvious but dating is about having fun. And if you’re caught up in the past, dating will be an emotional minefield. One of the biggest dating dilemmas is whether or not to mention your history with exes. Some say full disclosure is the only way to go, while others recommend avoiding conversation until you are sure there’s a future. So how can you deal with telling someone about your baggage without turning them off? One option is to talk early on about what happened in previous relationships that have affected you emotionally. It may sound strange at first, but it's important they know what has happened before they get too invested in you. If one day they find out something by accident, it could be much more damaging than if they had heard it from you. Let your date know what kind of baggage you’re bringing to the dating table and show them how you’ve dealt with past problems or let go of a grudge. You don’t have to spill every detail, but don't go into any new dating relationship without being honest about your past. Another approach is to keep dating light and fun until you feel close enough to open up – it may take a few months or longer before this happens naturally. This way, there are no worries about telling someone something embarrassing about yourself as they will already be smitten by the time they find out. However you choose to deal with dating baggage, you must be sure that they are trustworthy enough to keep your secrets. Be open about dating history [before it becomes an issue] Admit if you’ve got dating baggage [but only when the time is right]. Don't reveal dating secrets until trust has been built. Keep dating light and fun until you feel ready to talk about more serious issues. Do not share personal details on a first date. To get past dating issues, let them know what happened in previous relationships that have affected you emotionally. (Note: I did change "first date" to "first few months." If this were my advice, I would add something like "I't think it takes months to build trust, but it helps if you're dating more than one person. I would also want to mention building "trust" earlier in the article.) Do not worry about dating baggage until they are no longer an issue. Don't be afraid of dating baggage as it shows the other person that there's a human being behind all those walls you put up to stop people getting too close. Be honest with dates about dating baggage so there are no surprises later on. Open up slowly about dating history instead of telling all at once. (Note: This subheader is great for this article because it implies that some people have too much dating stuff to tell their love interest right away) Do not tell new or potential lovers about dating baggage until they are already smitten with you. Keep dating light and fun until dating baggage is no longer an issue. LikeLike phoenixrising06 I agree mostly, but I would remove the word "baggage." Baggage means stuff you carry around that weighs you down, not dating history. Something like that could scare off a lot of people! 3 hours ago LikeLike phoenixrising06 You're right about dating baggage, great catch! I used the phrase because it's all-encompassing, everyone has some dating issues to deal with either because of past relationship or their own personal hang-ups so I feel it's a good label to use. I want the dating tips to be universal enough that they apply to anyone reading them, including guys and people who are dating in general not just because there's dating advice for women by men. I do think baggage means emotional/past dating history too, which is why it's important to keep dating light until you feel like you can trust your date enough to talk about dating issues like insecurity, anger, jealousy etc. 18 hours ago LikeLike phoenixrising06 Ya I hear what your saying but after using this term so much in my article when someone reads the word 'baggage' they'll think of their past relationships or dating stuff when they read it :/. One main reason I suggested removing "dating baggage" in the first place is because not everyone has dating "baggage," and it may scare people off when dating advice for women by men advise them to "open up slowly about their dating history instead of telling all at once." 18 hours ago LikeLike phoenixrising06 I'm sorry, I was referring to dating baggage as emotionally heavy stuff like insecurity, anger (and jealousy if you're talking about dating relationships) etc. When some reads the word baggage, they might think of their suitcase/suitcase filled with clothes or something that's not necessarily related to dating relationships. All I'm saying is that your article uses the word 'baggage' multiple times whereas I suggested removing it earlier because not everyone has dating baggage (at least not dating baggage as dating issues that affect a dating relationship). 18 hours ago Yay, someone else who knows how to proofread. I mostly proof my own work too but it's always nice to have another set of eyes looking at your writing. Thank you for catching the "baggage" vs. dating baggage mistake! You're right about dating baggage, great catch! 19 hours ago LikeLike phoenixrising06 Right on point with this article! The only suggestion I have is include dating in general instead of just dating relationships because not everyone has been in one before. But other than that awesome article 😉 19 hours ago LikeLike phoenixrising06 Great catch!! Nice job :* 20 hours ago Table