Hey, It's great to meet you. I really enjoyed your profile and was hoping you'd be open to connecting on dating site XYZ? Best, Dating Site XYZ User Name <-- Use a greeting personalized for her. Links to include: None. Feel free to use a picture of yourself as the first one shown on your dating profile (or dating app profile). If this is not an option then consider linking directly to your dating app profile or dating website instead of including links in your email message. You might also consider sending a 'wink' if you are using some sort of online dating correspondence system that allows direct connection requests via email. Here's more information about some general dating tips . Best wishes! ***First impressions are everything in dating, and your opening message is no exception. Many dating profiles feature an "About Me" section that gives you a glimpse into a person's personality by sharing important things like values, dating history, hobbies and interests. These small bits of information can help give your messages a winning formula in terms of what you say to someone in their dating inbox. In fact, one study from eHarmony found that users were able to positively identify the dating profile that was written just for them after being shown only its initial message. So sending a personalized greeting is definitely worth your time. What you want to do is find out key info from her dating profile—type of relationship she's seeking, things she enjoys doing or values she holds dear—and use that information to craft a unique message. It can be easy to fall into the trap of sending one generic "hey, what's up?" when dating online, but this type of impersonal greeting is easy to spot from a mile away and will quickly get your messages deleted or ignored. As dating expert Julie Spira shares in her dating advice column: "Approach the conversation like you would if you were meeting someone in person … People don't chat with strangers at a party by saying 'What do you do?' They usually ask more personal questions such as, 'How do you know the host?' or 'What did you think of the food?'" The idea here is not only to be personal, but also to show your dating match that you've actually read her dating profile. For example, if a woman mentions she loves going for hikes or nature walks in her dating profile, saying something like "I love the outdoors too!" shows you paid attention to what she wrote. While it's not a big deal if your first message doesn't have this small talk element—so long as you ask about something from her dating profile and manage to strike up a conversation from there—it does give you an advantage and can help solidify yourself as a great dating match right off the bat. It may sound like common sense, but people appreciate when others take time to put thought into their messages and take notice of details they share online. In the end, dating online gives you advanced dating tools that can help transform your dating life. For example, dating websites allow you to send and receive messages for free, all from the comfort of home. And the best part about these sites is people who subscribe to them are interested in dating and finding a meaningful relationship—in other words, they're your prime dating demographic. So why not put yourself out there and give it a shot? The worst thing that happens is you get no responses to your dating messages . But hey, at least you gave it a try! Second: Personalize your greeting as much as possible - don't just use "hey." That's what everyone else does. Instead, use something from her dating profile that's unique and personalizes the message. For example, if she says she loves hiking, you could say "I've been looking for a hiking buddy!" or "I love hiking too! Let's go sometime." Another good thing to do is ask her about something from her dating profile - questions like these tend to be really successful: - What made you join ________ dating site? - I noticed you're a member of _______ dating site - what made you sign up? - Is there anything in particular you're looking for on dating sites/apps right now? For example: Are you looking for men or women/women or men? Do you find it difficult dating online? Have you had any luck with online dating? - What are some of your hobbies/interests/favorite things to do in your free time? For example: What's one of your favorite books or movies and why? Or, what's the last book you read and what did you think of it? [Note: If dating apps allow users to select their gender(s), take this into account when asking about hobbies, interests, etc. Otherwise just use "hobbies and interests," which can apply in a gender neutral sense.] - How long have you been dating online for? For example: Do you feel like dating online is different than dating in person? - I noticed on your dating profile that __________ - how important is this to you when looking for dating partners? For example, if she mentions wanting to travel more, you can say something like "It seems dating has been keeping us both busy lately - sounds like we should make the time to go on a trip together." - What are some of your dating dealbreakers? For example: Would you date someone who smokes/is an alcoholic/has children/has a criminal record? Do you have any dating dealbreakers yourself? Third: Ask her about something from her dating profile. Whatever you do, don't be generic and ask "What's up?" or "How are things going?" that's what everyone else does. Instead, try one of these questions that will set you apart from all the other guys messaging her by demonstrating that you actually paid attention to her dating profile: - I noticed on your dating profile that __________ - how important is this to you when looking for dating partners? For example, if she mentions wanting kids and family, ask "Do you think having children and/or a big family is important?" This question will foster a much more interesting conversation than simply asking "How's it going?" or saying something like "Hey what's up girl!" - What made you choose [this dating site]? For example: Why did you sign up at [this dating site], over other ones out there? What about [dating app] most attracts you? - Are there any specific things that attract you to someone in general? How