It's not a great idea to walk into Costco and say, "give me what I want." That may bring you a broom, 20 rolls of duct tape, a seven-pound tub of Nutella, a four-foot tall wine glass, or anything that happens to be on sale or on the "get rid of this" list. Or the sales folks may answer, "well, tell us what you want," and "please, put on your face mask while doing so." The same is true for dating life. If you are dating someone who used to find you attractive but no longer does after dating for about 6 months (the dating time frame could vary depending on people), it will be hard him/her back to see you in the same dating light again. You may be asking, "is it my fat thighs? Do I have a stinky breath after eating garlic fries for dinner tonight?" It could go deeper than that. For example, your dating partner may start feeling you are "clingy." This is not good dating signals to send out. Remember, dating is never meant to be full of clinging feelings or thoughts. You just need to let him/her go without saying any words about it. Just say bye and move on with your life like nothing happened (or like every casual dating relationship should end). Over time, he/she will realize you mean no harm (you are not trying to make himher clingy by sending out dating signals) and you are not about to be "that girl" (you can see the dating profile of "that girl" here). You may want to know how long it takes for dating partners who used to find each other attractive to start dating again. The time varies depending on people--some take 1 month, some take 6 months or even up to a year before both parties finally realize that they will never resume dating each other when they meet in the future. This dating tip is brought to you by dating coach Evan Marc Katz . For more dating tips, visit his website at www.marclaw.com . © 2008-2012 Evan Marc Katz, All Rights Reserved. Thank you so much! This article was a great success. We appreciate Evan's kind words about datingchop.com and especially our dating coach for men services . Thank you again! datingchop co-owner Posted by datingchop at 8:45 PM 0 comments Of course, it helps to tell other people what you really want. But this is not always enough. If you say to someone, "I want X." And he or she asks why? You may be tempted to respond with something like, "this is what I want" and follow up with an explanation that goes along the lines of "because I said so." This answer will raise red flags if the person asking the question doesn't understand their role in your dating/relationship life and isn't dating you because he or she understands what they represent to you. ... dating coach Mark Greene points out in his dating advice for women newsletter , telling someone what they want is not enough, particularly if they don't understand their role and what you expect from them (such as in a dating relationship). When communicating with others about your dating life, it helps to communicate in terms of feelings rather than thoughts and/or explanations . If someone asks you why you want something, tell them how you feel. This will help them understand where your head is at when considering dating (or other relationship) decisions. For example: "I like ____," "I would like ____," "I am getting tired of ____" instead of "I want _____" and "I think you should _____." The dating coach also provides a formula dating tip for dating success: When someone asks, "why do you want ___?" the best answer to give is one that includes a feeling statement along with an explanation. In other words, saying something like "because I would feel more safe," or "because I would feel better about dating you when ___," or even "because it makes me sad to see that our dating has been going in this direction when I thought we were both open to growing together," will be the most effective ways of communicating your dating desires. ...This type of communication can help a person understand your dating life in a deeper way than simply telling him/her bluntly what you want. dating coach dating services dating-singles dating-advice dating-service datingchop dating tips Posted by datiingchop at 9:22 AM 0 comments dating tips dating coach dating dating-advice dating-singles dating-service datingchop datiing Of course, it helps to tell other people what you really want. But this is not always enough. If you say to someone, "I want X." And he or she asks why? You may be tempted to respond with something like, "this is what I want" and follow up with an explanation that goes along the lines of "because I said so." This answer will raise red flags if the person asking the question doesn't understand their role in your dating/relationship life and isn't dating you because he or she understands what they represent to you. ... datingngchop at 7:03 PM 0 comments 't dating you because he* or she understands what they represent to you*. This dating tip is brought to you by dating coach Mark Greene of datingtipsformen . For more dating tips, visit his website at www.datingtrainermarkgreene.com . © 2008-2012 dating tips for men LLC, All Rights Reserved. Thank you so much! This article was a great success. We appreciate dating coach Mark's kind words about datingchop.com and especially our dating coach for women services . Thank you again! datingchop co-owner ...When communicating with others about your dating life, it helps to communicate in terms of feelings rather than thoughts and/or explanations . If someone asks you why you want something, tell them****I remember dating one woman who was very open about what she wanted...in bed. My first real dating experience came during my freshman year of college. I went to an all-boys high school, so this was a new deal for me. I decided that dating might be fun now, so there I was dancing with the ladies at bars and talking about how much fun it is to have sex with them on Tinder after getting their numbers from being "charming." But dating got me no action, until I met Stacey* . Stacey used to tell me exactly what she wanted in bed. She told me where her neck should be licked, which spots were "no-fly" zones, what positions felt great—you name it***Let ’s face it. Sometimes dating can be difficult. So how do you tell someone what you really want? It helps to start out with a very clear picture of the type of person you are looking for, and what things are most important to you in a relationship. There is no good way to put those ideas into words without seeming demanding and picky, so let’s first consider some other dating advice: 1) “Don’t seem too eager or desperate” – dating shouldn’t feel like work either! You don’t want to seem uninterested, but if we were meant to be together we will make it happen… somehow. 2) “Be yourself because everyone else is taken” – well, at least dating can be a little more relaxed and easy going if we just do what we would normally do. 3) “Put your best foot forward” – dating from a place of strength rather than from weakness is always better, right? 4) “He/she who cares the least wins.” – dating advice that conflicts with every other dating advice? This one requires you to walk on really shaky ground! You don’t want to seem desperate or care too much, but you also don’t want to give up before you start. Okay, now that I have said all that… What does it mean to find someone who truly wants a long term relationship with you, and who shares your values? The answer is much simpler than dating advice would have you believe. When dating someone, don’t waste your time dating someone who cares more about themselves! This person does not care about me or my needs or wants at all. They don’t respond to texts as soon as I send them (because they are too busy), their car isn’t clean enough inside (I can never find a parking space!), they request things from me rather than offering to do those things for me (they must think I am a walking ATM machine), they cancel last minute, and when we try to plan a date, it always seems like it just happens naturally – by accident – because their*** What you want doesn't always help, either. If you go into dating like your life depends on it (which is not necessarily a bad thing), then expect disappointment. If you go into dating expecting to change people…and dating relationships are almost never about changing the other person…then you will be sorely disappointed. What's more important than "what do I want" or "what don't I want", or whatever? How clear are you about what the other person wants? While this statement sounds good on paper, if taken at face value can cause problems of its own -- for example, dating someone whose deepest desire is an enduring relationship and only date sporadically would likely leave that first individual frustrated and dissatisfied because he/she is dating someone whose dating is inconsistent and sporadic. The dating process is best served when both people share the same or similar desires for dating, not conflicting or varying desires. One central theme of dating should be to find out what kind of person one dates, and once dating that individual , to look at whether you can live with him/her as a potential prospect for marriage and family life. If your desire is to marry and have a family, then it follows that some degree of commitment from the other party would be nice too. A date may say they want an enduring relationship as well, but if that person also says he/she only dates sporadically then conflict begins to arise as potentially setting up marriage begins -- compatibility must exist on virtually