Ever feel like dating apps are taking over your life? You've got this dating app, that dating app, and maybe even another dating app. And you're not sure why—you're open to dating people who meet up in real life (IRL), but you're getting bored with the process of only talking to people online or on dating apps. It turns out that it's easy to get wrapped up in dating apps when you don't have any clear goals for the way things should go. And sometimes it feels good just to be dating lots of people at once, so you can cross them off your list or play one against the other. But if you've realized that this dating-everywhere approach isn't doing much for your love life, you may find dating app burnout creeping up on you. Do yourself a favor and focus your dating energy. You can still be open to dating people IRL—just because things are going well on dating apps doesn't mean they'll go well in real life. But if you set boundaries for online dating, it's more likely that everyone will turn out the way you want them to: either your new partner, or someone with whom there's no connection at all. Here's some advice on how to do that. 1) Know what you're looking for If you answered anything other than "I'm not totally sure," then that means there are certain characteristics this person should have (and things they shouldn't be doing, if dating apps are how you're meeting them). But there are some other things to consider. If dating apps have turned you into a dating maniac, dating "everywhere" might not be good for you—it could lead to dating app burnout , where it feels like too much of the same old thing, and even though many people meet online these days, that doesn't mean that everyone should. There's nothing wrong with offline matches either; after all, that's still how most people end up meeting their partners (and there's actually less pressure when it happens in real life). 2) Let people know what you're looking for It can help both you and the person trying to understand where he or she fits in. And dating app burnout doesn't only happen when dating is unsatisfying; it's also possible that dating lots of people makes you feel like there are no good options. If you're keeping the dating apps around for when it works, then go ahead and stay connected to dating apps in some way (keeping your profile up can help weed out bad matches). But if dating apps aren't the way you want to find love, make sure people know what kinds of dates or relationships don't work for you—and save yourself time by not wasting it on endless conversations with Mr./Ms. Wrong. 3) Know how to say goodbye Just because a date doesn't go well doesn't mean he or she has to be a horrible human being. But dating app burnout can creep up on you, and sometimes dating a lot of people will make them all start to blend together. If you're dating online or dating everywhere, it can be harder to cut someone out of your life who isn't a good match—especially if there are lots of other options constantly being dangled in front of you. You might have already formed an impression before even meeting this person that the date won't work out. Before things get too far, let him or her know why things probably won't go well…and avoid a drawn-out conversation where both parties keep talking past each other and going nowhere. 4) Don't bite off more than you can chew Some people struggle to turn people down and end up getting lost in endless conversations with a bunch of people, all of whom they feel lukewarm about. This isn't productive either—it can lead to dating app burnout, where you're sinking a ton of time and energy into the process, talking to a million people at once, and not really deeply connecting with a single one of them. If dating apps have been giving you dating app burnout or dating fatigue , then slow things down a bit: remove some apps from your phone, go on fewer dates for a while, or just delete your dating profile altogether. You'll save yourself time and energy that you can channel into finding the right person. So remember: dating apps aren't bad or evil, but dating online shouldn't be something you do for the sake of dating online. If dating apps are making dating more exhausting than it needs to be, instead of dating everywhere or dating app burnout , just have some dates—and keep your profile on dating apps if you feel like it—instead of always being out there at all times. By Enrico Alleva, staff writer for datingadvice.com . Jarune Uwujaren is a Contributing Writer for Everyday Feminism . A Nigerian-American recent graduate who's stumbling towards a career in writing, Jarune can currently be found drifting around the DC metro area with a phone or a laptop nearby. When not writing for fun or profit, Jarune enjoys food, fresh air, good books, drawing, poetry, and sci-fi. Check out their website here . Follow them on Twitter @jaruneuwujaren or check out their articles here . If you have a dating question I can help answer send me an email at [email protected] with "Ask Dr. NerdLove" in the subject line and we'll save the world from dating app burnout together. This article was originally published at Everyday Feminism . Reprinted with permission from the author. © Everyday Feminism , All Rights Reserved. You may copy and distribute this material (you may need to cut and paste this link: " everydayfeminism.com2015/03/dont